Every Bride Needs Something Blue

Tales Of An Educated Debutante

on life, loss and the joy that rules the day.


 
 
 
 
 




 
The future is far away and scary, but today is lovely.

Adrian H. Wood, PhD


Grieving Normalcy

Saturday, July 30, 2016 Adrian H. Wood Comments (1)
Grieving Normalcy

I do, you know. Grieve the long ago normalcy that flowed through my veins as I moved through my days, my life, unaware of the ease that surrounded me. Normal life with a husband, four children, crazy life, sleeplessness and juggling schedules but we were just one family in a sea of million and like most, we moved easily in this place of ignorance. It was before, those days of being normal and as much as I detest that word, it is as an apt description that I can cling to describe those d ..

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Beware of "Baby Friendly"

Friday, July 29, 2016 Adrian H. Wood Comments (3)
Beware of "Baby Friendly"

Beware of "Baby Friendly" It's sounds innocent, doesn't it? After all, what's not to like about a term that supports kindness to our smallest citizens. The latest headlines state that hospitals boast baby friendly initiatives and I find myself raising my hand and shouting, "Yes!", but then I read the fine print and I begin to feel heart palpitations and I remember. Three years ago, my fourth child was due any day and while languishing at the pool watching my older three childr ..

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Why I'm Afraid To Talk About My Child's Special Needs

Tuesday, July 26, 2016 Adrian H. Wood Comments (3)
Why I'm Afraid To Talk About My Child's Special Needs

I try to temper how much I divulge, too much may be just that, too much. I have reason to believe it is a conversation to temper because there are those that avoid the too deep conversation with me, perhaps my openness of reality is overtly frightening and maybe you think I may start blabbing your secrets too. Or, is it just more than you can handle or than you bargained for in our light and airy friendship? Regardless of the underpinnings, my special needs talk seems to be scaring som ..

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Dear Delta

Tuesday, July 26, 2016 Adrian H. Wood Comments (0)
Dear Delta

Dear Delta, Do you remember me? I was the forty something mom, a little too tan and rather average looking, one of the thousand moms that boards your airplanes each day. This is a picture of my son and I, just a couple hours before we made our way to you. Remember, I told you we had fled the hospital from his outpatient surgery this very morning. In the moment captured by that photo, I was feeling nervous and hopeful, not yet fully awake but awed and comforted by the kind staff at Y ..

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Does He Have any New Words Yet?

Monday, July 25, 2016 Adrian H. Wood Comments (0)
Does He Have any New Words Yet?

Nothing like slaying the elephant, only this time it was not Thomas Edison, but my ten year old son, Thomas, and there was no actual elephant unless you count the boy named Amos. He is our elephant though, in the most figurative way possible, as we wait with baited breath for the words to breech the surface. The question came hard and fast; we had only arrived home from surgery late that evening. Amos was reunited with Thomas the following day and as he smiled at his big brother ..

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Babyhood Expectations

Saturday, July 23, 2016 Adrian H. Wood Comments (0)
Babyhood Expectations

View on Babble (https://www.babble.com/parenting/my-four-children-are-proof-the-baby-years-never-go-as-planned/) The first story of my “babyhood” expectations was written on thick lined paper when I was in the first grade. It tells of my dreams of becoming a “baby doctor” when I grew up, though it quickly becomes clear that 7-year-old me really just wanted to be a mama — specifically to a “cute, blue-eyed blonde baby.” Years later, my hopes of babyhood would be fulfilled,  ..

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Beautiful

Friday, July 22, 2016 Adrian H. Wood Comments (1)
Beautiful

"It's beautiful," he said. I paused, trying to comprehend the words of my ten year old son, contemplating if I had heard him correctly. Again he said it, this time a bit more mumbled and quiet, but the words that floated by my ears were as ephemeral as I had imagined. "It's beautiful," he said as we stood peering at the lovely deep pink poppy. It had flown out from his mind and was off his lips before he had time to stop himself, a typical ten year old that seeks ways to work jargon ..

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What If You Had Been Given A Choice?

Tuesday, July 19, 2016 Adrian H. Wood Comments (2)
What If You Had Been Given A Choice?

I would choose him again and again and again. I would choose him if you offered me a sea of children. Why is he worth the effort, the struggle, the tears, the exhaustion? The loss of the life that is no more and the grief that follows make that choice seem unconscionable, even to myself, the mother of a special needs child. Life is simple is no more, never will be again and yet, it is worth it. Maybe I'm wrong though, this path feels too hard, too rough, too heartbreaking but th ..

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Anniversaries Aren't Always Lovely

Monday, July 18, 2016 Adrian H. Wood Comments (1)
Anniversaries Aren't Always Lovely

Death felt a terrible thing when it came stealthy that hot July morning. It robbed the beautiful person that was not yet grown up, but not a child either. His future was just within reach and yet, he couldn't escape his fate no matter the perceived invincibility that rules the lives of lovely boys nearly 20 years old. My own innocence had evaporated slowly over the cancer that snuffed out my brother's light over the course of that year. I was a semblance of an old soul when it came to l ..

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After His Surgery

Sunday, July 17, 2016 Adrian H. Wood Comments (0)
After His Surgery

"Think how frustrated we will feel if he does talk after his surgery." The words of my ten year old son as we lie on the carpet in Amos' room and he played between us, content in his own silence and happily pushing a car along the edge of a hand me down parking garage. His words floated over Amos' silky nearly white gold hair, still damp from an evening bath with his oldest brother. I paused and pondered my response and was struck with the incredibleness of the moment. This  ..

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