Every Bride Needs Something Blue

Tales Of An Educated Debutante

on life, loss and the joy that rules the day.


 




 
The future is far away and scary, but today is lovely.

Adrian H. Wood, PhD


Ten Mother's Day Quotes

Sunday, May 14, 2017 Adrian H. Wood Comments (0)
Ten Mother's Day Quotes

1. It's Mother's Day and you're making me yell. 2. You're complaining and I'm not relaxing. 3. Can you people just not fight for one tiny day? 4. I'm trying to be nice but I'm about to beat you. 5. It's hard to be thankful for you when you're kicking him. 6. Can y'all just let me be? 7. It's so fun being a mother (I said this before getting out of bed.) 8. That is not a real present; it's a plastic cup from your Sunday school teacher. 9. Next year I' ..

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Join the Club

Sunday, April 30, 2017 Adrian H. Wood Comments (2)
Join the Club

Membership is fairly simple. It involves throwing your pride to the wind and conceding defeat, even on Sunday mornings. Once you can take your youngest to church in a John John, shirtless I might add, you'll get your key. It's a key to the club called Being Real and it is fantabulous. It's tough though, you've likely been striving for this thing called perfection for a while now and it won't be an easy break up. Abandoning any addiction takes willpower and fortitude, reminding yourself  ..

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My Dad Strikes Again

Thursday, April 27, 2017 Adrian H. Wood Comments (1)
My Dad Strikes Again

I hate to disappoint the many rabid fans of my father, but he has clearly been on his best behavior though I've got a few isms. 1. All the astronauts were from Ohio. John Glenn & Neil Armstrong, he told us, not once but six times as we watched Hidden Figures. 2. The Wright brothers were from Ohio too, even if people from North Carolina pretend they're not. My dad is from Ohio in case you were wondering. 3. My son: I didn't know the volume could go up to 99.  ..

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Recipe for Troll Slaying

Wednesday, April 26, 2017 Adrian H. Wood Comments (0)
Recipe for Troll Slaying

1. Don't be rash. One must not get their panties in a wad over hurtful comments. Seriously, this is a time to grow in adversity and firm up your backbone. 2. Say nothing. This is the best method, but if you're like me, you can't stand to be quiet so scratch that one. 3. Remember to say thank you. I like to offer my appreciation and a query regarding their passionate interest in my topic. 4. Kill 'em with kindness. Be specific, like, you're expertise must be s ..

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Holler If You're Not A Size 2

Tuesday, April 25, 2017 Adrian H. Wood Comments (0)
Holler If You're Not A Size 2

Lululemon. A store that doesn't believe in capital letters and yet it has quite an army of unkind yogic defenders. I wrote, a bit tongue in cheek as always, my observations of the fancy athletic store on a recent trip to Miami. A bit of country mouse goes to the big city; she gets a view outside her snow globe that isn't limited to a few thousand folks, who come to find out, are so much nicer than the big wide world. Maybe it's Edenton or perhaps, just North Carolinians, but we do ..

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Middle of the Night Nonsensical Pondering

Tuesday, April 25, 2017 Adrian H. Wood Comments (0)
Middle of the Night Nonsensical Pondering

1. How in the Hell does anyone co-sleep and not look one hundred? I'm getting older by the second. Wednesday is senior citizens day at Rose's. 2. Again, people choose this as a way of life? I'm ready to drink a bottle of cough syrup just to get some shut eye with a spindly special needs three year old who is real chatty even though he's basically nonverbal. 3. Why is the dog so thirsty? She is old and wonderful, but she lies there and the minute she senses me being a ..

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Dear Lululemon

Monday, April 24, 2017 Adrian H. Wood Comments (1)
Dear Lululemon

I went in your store last night. 1. You need a real sign. Some sort of horseshoe insignia is supposed to attract country bumpkins from eastern NC? How are we supposed to know what you're selling? I was nervous it was some sort of private club. 2. Your clothes seem very small. Maybe they are just tight as the salesgirl told me they should be, but I don't like tight. 3. You only have one size 12 in everything. One, it has usually vamoosed by the time I make t ..

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Saturday's Food Diary (AKA Crap I Ate Yesterday)

Saturday, April 22, 2017 Adrian H. Wood Comments (0)
Saturday's Food Diary (AKA Crap I Ate Yesterday)

There may be some cause and effect to my body size dilemma. However, the truth shall set you free and so, here you go. Do people really write this stuff down? - 1 piece of white toast with two plastic containers of smushy butter - I omelet with spinach, tomato, cheddar cheese and sausage - A handful of home fries - 1/2 piece of toast shoved in my mouth leaving restaurant (in case of famine) - Amos' discarded banana - Amos' discarded bagel previously discarded by older  ..

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The Perfect Vacation

Tuesday, April 18, 2017 Adrian H. Wood Comments (0)
The Perfect Vacation

1. Inclusive resorts or Disney cruise. Yes, folks pointed out these options to me, but setting up a go fund me page seems a little bit tacky for entertainment respite reasons. 2. Travel with lots of families. Built in friends would mean my kids were outside without me and not arguing over their grandparent's one computer. 3. Me being lazy. I just want to be lazy. Like, sit by the pool, drink a coke, settle in and work on my book, watch Dateline, or take a shower and ..

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Laughter

Sunday, April 16, 2017 Adrian H. Wood Comments (1)
Laughter

An unlikely place. My mind says shhh, but my heart says joy. Laughter, shoving, wrestling with a tacky pink blanket, a cool morning, three excited children, three sleepy adults. Easter isn't much of what I remember as a child, at least not all of it. I remember hunting Easter baskets as our children do and some years they were the tacky ones packaged in crinkly plastic, the ones I drooled over at Kmart and some years they were more pristine, eggs and candy and even a cabbage patch doll.  ..

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