Every Bride Needs Something Blue

Tales Of An Educated Debutante

on life, loss and the joy that rules the day.


 
 
 
 
 




 
The future is far away and scary, but today is lovely.

Adrian H. Wood, PhD


The Father Named Josh

Saturday, June 18, 2016 Adrian H. Wood Comments (4)
The Father Named Josh

I knew him as a friend, not my friend this time though he grew to be one of my most treasured. No, he belonged to my husband and I remember their friendship before I remembered either of them. They were both from Raleigh, roommates at times in college and I spent a great deal at the address of 6 Dixie (for those students on the wrong side of tracks, there was no need to add Trail). Yes, for at least two semesters, my friends and I made our way to that location each and every Thursday. There  ..

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A Diagram of Grief

Monday, June 13, 2016 Adrian H. Wood Comments (2)
A Diagram of Grief

It has to be the smallest topic area of books. The grief section that is, at Barnes and Noble no less. The sales clerk gave me a litany of reasons of why they had what books where and which ones but all her explanations were superfluous considering the negative magnitude of the offering on grief or death. I promise the first book I opened had a full-fledged diagram, similar to the 10,927 I drew at Salem Academy. Ugh. This one was not nearly as interesting as grief was in the center and spin ..

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The Birthday Cake Tradition

Wednesday, June 08, 2016 Adrian H. Wood Comments (0)
The Birthday Cake Tradition

It has been going on for quite a while now I believe, twenty four years to be exact. Her life had only spanned eighteen years and so, the past twenty three years her father has gone out, purchased a cake and remembered the gift and life of his daughter. That is a lot of birthdays with no candle blowing, a cake, yet no exuberant celebration. Just the method of counting seems to add a half dozen years to the space of time we have missed her. Oh, how I have missed her. Missy. Shell. Kimbe ..

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The Gray Area of Bullying

Monday, May 16, 2016 Adrian H. Wood Comments (0)
The Gray Area of Bullying

It was not my child. No; I was sure of it. He couldn’t possibly be the mastermind behind all of the teasing that’s been happening at school. Still, I was surprised to hear that he was there for it all, observing from the sidelines. If I were to expect anyone to jump in, it would be him. Historically, he’s always been a bit eccentric himself, but I am guessing the suppression of of his own uniqueness may be what added to his desire to fit in — thus explaining his role as a sideline partic ..

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Anniversary of A Fire

Thursday, May 12, 2016 Adrian H. Wood Comments (0)
Anniversary of A Fire

It has been twenty years now, exactly twenty years ago today. A day that may have passed by without my acknowledgement except for a dear friend pointing out the anniversary on social media. I know from experience that anniversaries are not always indicative of dinner and roses. Though they often travel with lovely events such as weddings, they also cling on to tragedy too and in this case, a smoldering cigarette had sent a fraternity house up in flames and by early Mother's Day morning, fiv ..

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A Birthday Wish

Wednesday, May 11, 2016 Adrian H. Wood Comments (0)
A Birthday Wish

It was he that paced the halls. First, the birth of his son, my brother Adam. Five years later, it was I who came along, a daughter that my mother had craved. We were complete, a family of four, two beautiful parents, darling and funny children, a thriving business and home was made in Eastern North Carolina. The End. It never happens that way, does it? The story goes on and on with twists and curves and backslides and steep slopes and what remains is the rest of us. After a long year of ..

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The Toast

Sunday, April 24, 2016 Adrian H. Wood Comments (0)
The Toast

I gave a toast, you know. I had poured my heart out that very day and justified why I could not utter my brother's name at the wedding of my cousin and then I did exactly that. My voice broke and softened but I stood in front of the microphone, safe with my two sister cousins and I spoke. I mixed humor and loss and the overwhelming story of love which had blanketed me. The dread of my own actions had secured my plan of silence, perhaps I could muster a smile and a raised glass but that ..

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The Wedding Toast I Can't Give

Saturday, April 23, 2016 Adrian H. Wood Comments (0)
The Wedding Toast I Can't Give

I want to. I really want to and have one more chance tonight but I will not take it, it's too risky. I just can't. To share my heart on paper is one thing but to speak aloud to a room full of people is another. Particularly to the old friends and family members that were there that day, not my own wedding day but the day the mahogany box was carried and laid to rest beneath the soil beside a weeping willow overlooking a small pond. I go there every so often to sit and think, the breeze blow ..

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My Sibling Cousins

Friday, April 22, 2016 Adrian H. Wood Comments (0)
My Sibling Cousins

And then, there were four. That is the phrase that flashes in my mind when I consider the group of five that moved as a collective unit my whole childhood. My brother and I and our three cousins rode to school together, ate together, celebrated every birthday and holiday together and spent summers together at the beach. We lived within walking distance of one another our entire childhood and it was wonderful. As an adult, I realize what a gift that was and how our normal must have been ..

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The Favorite Child

Wednesday, April 20, 2016 Adrian H. Wood Comments (0)
The Favorite Child

He is my favorite, you know. How could he not be? He was destined to be mine just as my oldest son belongs to the grandmother he closely resembles, my daughter belongs to my husband, and my littlest, Amos, well … he belongs to all of us. I knew who my favorite would be — or at least, who I hoped he would be — so many years ago, when his uncle died. When he was still but a figment of my imagination. My brother had been called Adam when he was alive; but when he died, the name no longe ..

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